I Want to Go to Therapy, but I Don’t Know Why- Help!
You have this itchy feeling (and not that kind of itch), like “things could be different,” or “this isn’t how I thought it would be,” but you don’t know what to do next. Maybe you want to go to therapy, but you feel fine. You need a reason to go to therapy, right? You need to be in crisis or flipped out about the end of a relationship, in a career shift, or dealing with a horrible incident in your life. Right?
Wrong. You can go to therapy for no reason other than, “I want to.” When you’re done reading, you’ll have the information needed to justify the decision to go to therapy and communicate to your new therapist why you’d like to work with them.
The Inner Turmoil - What's Bothering Me Anyway?
The odds are against you. You’re probably a millennial or gen z’er (if you’re here), and the LAST THING you want to do is look whiney. You don’t want to be stereotyped and complain about what’s happening in your life and what has happened to you. What if your problems aren’t that bad, even if you have this gnawing belief that things aren’t that great, either.
Then there’s the issue of, what if you’re actually super messed up and just haven’t realized it yet? So either your new therapist will think you’re a whiney baby or that you’re a total freak and it’s a miracle you’ve made it this far.
Not today, Satan. It makes sense that you’ll put this off for another six months or so. You should just try another Whole 30.
And yet, you have this nagging feeling. You struggle with every single supervisor you have, is it you? Your friends aren’t the greatest, or at least not as great as you remember them being five years ago. Every August, you find yourself at the end of the summer. You still haven’t taken a vacation, or you're stressed about your parents, and sometimes it just feels like you’re living inside of Groundhog Day (a reference for millennials, maybe not Gen Z’ers).
Society Says So - Debunking 3 Therapy Myths
It would make sense for you to come to the table feeling a certain way about pursuing therapy or counseling. Especially for you all with anxiety, “what if how I feel isn’t bad enough to need therapy”? Let’s debunk 3 common myths about counseling.
1. Therapy is Only for the "Crazy" or Severely Troubled:
One of the most common myths is that therapy is solely for those with severe mental health issues or those on the brink of a breakdown. In reality, therapy is a valuable tool for anyone seeking personal growth, self-awareness, and emotional support, regardless of the severity of their struggles.
2. Seeking Therapy is a Sign of Weakness:
Another prevalent myth is that seeking therapy means you are weak or incapable of handling your problems alone. This couldn't be further from the truth! In fact, choosing therapy demonstrates strength and courage in acknowledging that you need support and are willing to take steps toward positive change.
3. Therapy Will Solve All Your Problems:
Some people believe therapy is a magic wand that will instantly fix all their issues and make their life perfect. While therapy can be transformative and empowering, it's not a one-size-fits-all solution. It requires active participation, openness, and a willingness to work through challenges to achieve lasting growth and well-being.
The Great Search - Finding the Right Therapist
Therapy is a weird field. There are hundreds of therapists and seemingly endless specialties, and also, NO ONE is available. It’s wild times out there right now. So once you sift through all the weird Psychology Today profiles (with so many words on them but say absolutely nothing), and narrow it down to an in-person or online therapist, then the phone calls and the awkward emails begin. You don’t want to tell them too much over the phone (at risk of seeming weird, obviously), but you also don’t want to tell them too little because some of the details really matter. Understandably, you want to work with someone who is okay with your sexual orientation, relationship structure, profession, religion (or lack thereof). You’d rather never talk to another human again than talk to someone who _____ (fill in the blank with your Voldemort scenario).
Let’s assume you make it through. And you find them. They seem really cool; the phone call wasn't awful. They can see you when you’re free and in a location that doesn’t involve too much traffic. Congrats!
The Great Expectations - What Am I Really Looking for in a Therapist?
Ah, the great expectations of therapy - the hopes and dreams we project onto this therapeutic journey can be as grandiose as a blockbuster movie plot. But let's strip away the cinematic fantasies and explore what we should realistically seek in a therapist.
First and foremost, finding a therapist with whom you can establish a genuine connection is essential. This doesn't mean they should be your new BFF, but rather someone who understands you respects your values, and creates a safe space where you can be unapologetically yourself.
Beyond that, consider the therapeutic approach. Are you seeking practical solutions to specific issues, or are you looking for a deeper exploration of your thoughts and emotions? Understanding what you truly need from therapy will guide you in finding a therapist who aligns with your goals.
A great therapist is an expert listener - someone who doesn't just hear your words but actively listens to what lies beneath the surface. This skill allows them to ask thought-provoking questions and help you gain insights into your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
A therapist should empower you to become your own best advocate. Instead of offering cookie-cutter advice, they should guide you in developing coping strategies and decision-making skills so you can confidently navigate life's challenges.
So, as you embark on this therapeutic quest, remember that finding the right therapist is like searching for a rare gem. You may encounter a few rocks along the way, but the magic of personal growth and self-discovery can truly unfold when you find that perfect match.
Should I Tell Anyone I Go to Therapy? The Therapeutic Closet
It’s a real dilemma, do you keep your therapy journey a secret or share it with others? It's as if therapy has its very own closet, and you're standing at the door, contemplating whether to keep it locked away or let the world peek inside. The truth is, the decision is entirely yours to make. Some may find solace in keeping it private, while others find strength in being open about their therapeutic endeavors. Embrace the freedom of choice and decide what feels right for you.
If you do choose to share your therapy journey with friends, get ready for those curious inquiries. "Why therapy?" "What's wrong?" "Are you okay?" The questions might flood in like an avalanche, but fear not, for you are the gatekeeper of your boundaries. You can choose how much you want to disclose, who you want to share with, and when to say, "I'd rather not talk about it." Remember, therapy is about your personal growth, not about satisfying others' curiosity.
The Unexpected Benefits - Surprises Along the Way
In therapy, even the smallest changes can create a butterfly effect, with ripples spreading far beyond your sessions. As you delve into the depths of your emotions and thought patterns, you'll start noticing subtle yet profound shifts in your daily life. From improved communication with loved ones to newfound clarity in decision-making, therapy's impact is as delicate and beautiful as a butterfly's wings.
Therapy is not just a solo expedition; it extends its positive influence to your relationships as well. As you grow and evolve through therapy, you'll find that the dynamics with your loved ones shift too. Communication becomes more open, empathy deepens, and you'll navigate conflicts with newfound understanding. Witness the ripple effect of your personal growth as it enriches the connections you hold dear.
In this adventure called therapy, embrace the surprises and unexpected benefits that await you. The beauty of the therapeutic journey lies not only in uncovering the mysteries within yourself but also in witnessing the far-reaching impact it has on your life and relationships. It's like discovering hidden treasure, one session at a time.
Wrapping Up
In this whirlwind exploration of therapy indecision, we've debunked the myths, faced inner turmoil, and embarked on the search for the perfect therapist. Along the way, we've learned that seeking therapy is not a sign of weakness but an act of courage and self-awareness. It's a journey that defies societal norms and embraces the enigma of self-discovery.
Often clouded in misconceptions, therapy is not reserved for the "crazy" or those in dire straits; it's a valuable tool for anyone seeking personal growth and emotional support. It's a safe zone where you can unmask your emotional armor, embrace your quirks, and find strength in vulnerability.
While the decision to seek therapy may come with apprehensions, rest assured that the benefits are boundless. As you navigate the winding path of self-exploration, be open to unexpected surprises - the butterfly effect of therapy that extends its transformative touch to your daily life and relationships.
Finding the right therapist is like discovering a rare gem; it may take some time and effort, but the magic of genuine connection and personal growth awaits. As you embark on this therapeutic quest, take pride in owning your journey and breaking free from the taboos that once held you back.
So, to all the millennial and Gen Z readers out there, let this blog be your guiding light, igniting the spark within you to take that step towards therapy, even if you're not sure why. Embrace the unknown, challenge the norms, and fearlessly venture into the uncharted territory of self-discovery. The therapeutic journey may be a comedy of errors and insights, but rest assured, it's one filled with growth, wisdom, and empowerment.
In the end, when you look back at your decision to seek therapy, you'll realize that "I want to" is reason enough. You are deserving of this journey, and you have the power to shape it into a tale of strength, resilience, and personal triumph.
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Other Services Offered at Two Rivers Therapy
At Two Rivers Therapy, we understand you may be struggling with multiple problems. To best support our clients in achieving optimal mental health and well-being, we offer anxiety therapy, depression treatment, trauma therapy, therapy for teens, and therapy for the overwhelmed and overworked. In addition to these services, we also offer clinical supervision to receive guidance and support from someone who has more experience than you may. To learn more, check out our blog or About Us!
Ann Robinson (she/her) LCSW, is a trauma therapist, coach, and clinical supervisor in Fort Collins, Colorado. Ann has a knack for working with womxn who exudes enough grit and resilience to make Wonder Woman blush. Her secret weapon? Incorporating humor into therapy sessions because, let's face it, life's too short to take everything so seriously. Ann's got your back if you're ready to cope with life stressors without burning the candle at both ends. When she's not busy helping her clients navigate life's ups and downs, you can find her co-owning Two Rivers Therapy & Consulting.
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